Girls Day Out

**Many apologies for the terrible quality of the above picture. Of course, I forgot my Nikon at home so I was unable to capture this event properly. So what to do?? Use my cell phone camera, which I have found out is pretty crappy.**

Today Ava, Grandma and I ventured out to the Mall of America to spend a much anticipated morning at the American Girl Store having brunch and shopping. Oh, and I cannot foget to mention that Julie came along as well. She EVEN had her own special chair, and was served pink lemonade, and a small bowl of fruit - so very fancy. After Julie was settled in and served (you are in the American Girl doll store, so it only seems fitting that the dolls get served first, right? :) ) us girls decided to order our meals. Ava decided on the blueberry pancakes, grandma had french toast, and I opted for the ham and cheese omelet. All I have to say is.... DELISH! Of course it should have been considering it cost $14 per person.


We also did a bit of shopping while we were there, as Julie needed some new threads. Ava decided that Julie needed some ice skates so that they could go ice skating together when Daddy takes her. (hopefully this will happen before all the snow melts....) She then hit good old Mom up for some pajamas for Julie - $24. Ugh. I agreed to the purchase as what's a gal to do without a pair of pajamas to sleep in, right? As we were getting ready to make our purchases, Ava noticed the matching pajamas in her size. Of course they have to sell stuff like this. More money for us suckers know as Mom and Grandma to spend. After looking at the price tag - $40 - yes, you read correctly, $40 I told her that we would not be able to get them. She was devastated to say the least. Truly devastated. The look on her face almost got me to pick up the pair of pajamas, throw caution to the wind, and make the purchase. But I thought better after I had a vision of us returning home, Daddy taking a gander at our purchases (more importantly the price tags), and seeing his facial expression. This would not be good. Nope, not at all.


Grandma ended up saving the day by suggesting the next time we come, Mom would pay $20, and Grandma would pay $20 and then we could buy them. This seemed to do the trick as she was happy again.


I am only wondering how many times over the next month few months I am going to hear


"When are we going back to the American Girl doll store Mom?"

Happy Birthday Anthony Thomas!

As I sit here writing this I am still in awe over the fact that today you are 3 years old! I feel like it was just yesterday that Daddy and I were in the hospital having you. Boy does the time fly.... I wanted to write you a note today to say Happy Birthday, to let you know how very much I love you, and to tell you all about who you have become, and how you have grown over the past year of your life.

You have always been quite attached to your momma. You enjoy following me around the house while I do my daily chores, doing the dishes, the laundry, vaccuming - it seems whatever it is I am doing you are right beside me, which is just fine. Sometimes, while you are watching cartoons I will try and sneak upstairs to put away the laundry - when I am about halfway up the stairs I hear the pitter patter of your little feet on the wood floor followed by you shouting, "Mommy,wait for me, wait for me!" I oblige, and wait until your little legs can catch up with me. Then and only then do I finish walking upstairs and putting away the laundry. With you by my side. There was even a point in time, right after I had Olivia, where you were so attached you would not let me take a shower without you. You would get in with me and sit right at my feet, happy as a clam. That phase has since passed, and now you like to simply lay right outside of the shower door and wait for me to take my shower.

There was a point in time I was getting really frustrated with the fact that you had to come everywhere with me and do everything with me. But that frustration soon passed after I spoke to a friend who gave me some wise advice. She told me to enjoy it now because before I know it you will grow up and not want to follow me around all the time, and that as surprising as it may seem, I will miss it. I am thinking she is very right about that. So I no longer find myself frustrated at your "attached at the hip" type attitude. I have decided to embrace it, and enjoy it while it lasts. My little Klingon.

Beyond your attachment to me, you are quite a little spit fire. You are not afraid to sass me, your Dad, or a complete stranger in the grocery store for that matter. This scares me a bit. You tend to get angry really quick when you don't get your way, which in turn usually lands you in a time out. But after your time out you are always so darn sweet. I make you apologize to whomever you "barked" at, and give said person a hug. Just last night we were playing Sorry as a family and you were angry that you did not get a card when you thought it was your turn. You yelled at me saying, "give me a card!" I told you it was not your turn, you said again, louder, "GIVE ME A CARD!!" followed by a loud scream, which in turn made Lucas start crying as it hurt his ears, which in turn landed you in a time out. I left you there for a moment, came back and asked you if you were ready to apologize. You said, "yes, sowwy Mommy, uppy please" (please pick me up). I picked you up, brought you over to Lucas to say sorry as well for screaming in his ear, you said in a very sincere, quiet voice "sowwy Lucas."

Some of the many things I love about you....

I love how you come up to me out of the blue and give me a butterfly kiss, or say I "wuv" you Mommy.

I love peeking in the playroom and watching your imagination run wild playing with your beloved Star Wars guys.

I love watching you play your Star Wars video game (your favorite thing ever right now)- the way your little fingers move to work the controls is amazing to me, and the look of concentration on your little face as you play is so sweet.

I love that you are perfectly content sitting on the floor with me in the playroom putting together puzzles and reading books all afternoon.

I love how you will sit with me for long periods of time and chat with me. The conversation is most often dominated by you, and I most often can only understand bits and pieces as whatever it is you are speaking about seems to be of great importance and cannot get out of your little mouth fast enough, but I don't mind at all. I just sit back and savor every moment, watching you speak, and seeing your facial expressions. Priceless.

These are moments I wish I could freeze in time. Moments that are so very special to me - Every.Single.One.

You are such a good little boy Anthony Thomas, people who do not know you will never understand how truly special you are. It has been such a joy watching you grow up over the past 3 years. You are growing by leaps and bounds, learning new things every day - I can't wait to see what the next 3 years brings.

Happy, happy birthday my "Sweetsy Cola", Mommy loves you to the moon.

Anthony and His Cake Issues

My Anthony Thomas will be turning 3 tomorrow, and we (meaning mom) have been on a quest for the past 3 weeks trying to hunt down a place that will make me a Star Wars cake. I went to Cub Foods, Wal Mart, Sams Club, and finally Kowalskis. All places I received a "Sorry, we do not make Star Wars cakes" reply. Darn it. I was hell bent on finding a Star Wars cake, because Anthony wanted one so badly (or so I thought), and because of the fact that I could not find one made me want to find one that much more. But after my final trip to Kowalski's, I decided to admit defeat, and ask Anthony what other kind of cake he would like. He looked a bit frightened when asked this question. I asked him what was wrong, and he said, lip quivering and all:

"I don't want a cake Mommy. Last time the cake 'hurted' me."

Hmmm... I stood in the cake isle at Kowalski's a bit perplexed, trying to figure out how his cake last year had hurt him. Could not come up with anything. So I asked how it hurt him:

"The cake burned me Mommy, I 'gotted' an owey on my lip."

Ahhh... I remembered, and was frankly impressed with the fact that he did, afterall he was only two at the time and it was a whole year ago. Here is the story behind him being scared of birthday cakes.

Last year, we put his cake on the island in the center of our kitchen, pulled a chair up to it and had him stand on said chair. Family crowded around, I lit the candle, we all sang happy birthday,


when finished, I told him to blow out his candle.


This is where the story goes from good to bad. He leaned in a bit too far to blow and ended up burning his lip. (blurry picture, but you can imagine how fast he pulled his head away from said candle after "feeling the heat" - ouch!)


Nonna tried to console him with a spoonful of icecream to the affected area. Seemed to work at the time. It turns out he has not forgotten about that painful episode....

Hence the whole fear of cakes.

After rehashing this whole story in my head while standing in Kowalski's I turned to him and assured him that he would not burn himself again, that Mommy would watch real closely so that his lip did not get too close to the candle. This seemed to make him feel better about picking out a cake, as he looked down at the book, pointed to the Batman cake and said:

"I want that one Mommy."

Batman it is. Though I have to say, all that work of trying to track down a d*** Star Wars cake and he ends up choosing Batman without a second thought. Typical.

GETTING A BIT TOO BIG FOR HER BRITCHES PART 1

I am continually amazed at the things that come out of my darling 6 year old Ava's mouth. Especially over the past 5 months, which would be ever since she started Kindergarten.

To be fair, I had been warned a plenty last summer to "watch out". That once they start Kindergarten, and take a bus to and from school, they tend to have a lot more time away from you, which in turn gives them ample time to pick up things. Things like nasty names to call one another, bits and pieces of issues they have no business knowing about quite yet. If you have a child in school, you know the things.

Here are some of the things she has been so inclined to discuss with me:

Ava: "Hey Mom, what is being gay mean?"

Mom: This was an easy one to answer, as there are two meanings, so I gave her the one easiest to explain. "It means being happy." Nice, right?

Ava: "Hey Mom, I hear it hurts to have babies, does it?

Mom: "Yes, a little bit." Simply put, no big explanation needed at this point in time. I was not about to tell her HOW HORRIBLY painful it really is, she is just too young for that. Plus, she will never quite understand the amount of pain that is brought on by birthing children until she does it herself. I remember asking my mom if it hurt to have babies as well. Her answer was this. "Yes, it does hurt, it sort of feels like when you have a really big poop that is not wanting to come out and you have to push, and push..." I still think that was a ridiculous way of explaining it, but I guess us mom's say whatever comes to mind when faced with such questions, right?

Ava: How do you make babies, and where do they come out of?"

GOOD LORD.

Mom: I had to think about this answer. "Well, Mom's and Dad's make babies when they really love eachother a lot. " Not the best answer, but I am thinking a 6 year old is way too young to hear the whole "birds and bees" talk, so this will just have to do for now. As to where they come out of, I simply said "Mommy's tummy" which is technically correct, they do come out of your tummy, I just left out the part where they travel through your "va-j-j" as well. Again, she is way too young to hear that part.

Ava: Walking out of my bedroom with my bra over her shoulders... "Hey Mom, when am I going to have big boobs like you?" (I so do not have big boobs, but I do have to say, it was nice hearing I do, even though it was out of the mouth of my 6 year old. Hey - I will take compliments wherever I can get them from!) :)

Mom: This was one of those times I had to turn around in laughter and take a moment to gain my composure... "You will grow breasts when you are a teenager, when you go through puberty."

Ava: "What are breasts, and what is puberty?

Yes, she is quite persistent with the questions.

Mom: "Breasts is another name for boobs, a better name to call them. Puberty is when you do a lot of growing - you get taller, your breasts grow, and things like that."

Ava: "When will I do that?"

Mom: "not for lots of year."

And these are just the conversations we have. You should hear the words she has been coming home throwing out at her brothers. She came home from school about a month ago, was angry at her brother and shouted "YOU IDIOT!" Let's just say that did not go over very well. She was sent to her room immediately where she was told to think about what she had said and apologize. Later I told her that was a very mean thing to say to someone and asked her if she knew what that word meant, she said no, that she just heard it on the bus.

Other intersting things she has been caught saying... These are quite standard, I am sure all you other mom's have heard them before - "That's it, I am so not going to be your friend anymore." "I don't like you Mom. You are soooo mean!!" And hear are a few doozies I have never had the pleasure of hearing before. "Ha, ha you have elf ears!!" and "You smell like raw fish!" Really. No jokes. I am wondering where kids come up with such insults. Especially when they have no idea what they are referring to when they say such things.

So do you see what I am dealing with here? I am feeling like she is growing up a bit too fast, learning about way too much, way too soon. I am frightened that this daughter of mine is going to put me into an early grave. (looooong sigh) My only saving grave is that when Olivia gets to be this age, this will all be "old hat" to me, I will have experienced questions and comments such as these from all of my other kids so I will be able to answer them better and just deal with it all better. But for now I am still in a state of amazement that she knows so much!

If these are the topics of conversation, and the kinds of questions I am getting from her at age 6, I can only imagine what is still yet to come.

All I can say is that I am frightened. Truly frightened.

The Great Debate

Last night, Ava and Lucas were sitting on the couch having a conversation about kissing. More specifically, who kisses who. Here is how it went down:

Ava: "Hey Lucas, when you get older you are going to kiss girls."

Lucas: "No, Ava, I am not going to kiss girls."

Ava: "Yes you are Lucas, you can't kiss boys, you have to kiss girls."

Lucas: giggling "no Ava, I am not going to kiss girls... yuck!"

Ava: (laughing) "Yes you are Lucas, and when I get older I am going to kiss boys!"

Lucas: (not laughing so much anymore) "NO I AM NOT GOING TO KISS GIRLS!!!"

Ava: (not liking that lucas is yelling now) "YES YOU ARE, BECAUSE THAT IS WHAT YOU ARE SUPPOSED TO DO!!"

Lucas says nothing, just sits on the couch crying uncontrollably at the thought of having to kiss a girl? Crazy. I am sure he will be changing his tune a few years from now, and will be quite looking forward to the prospect of kissing girls.

Ava: "Right mom? Lucas will kiss girls, and I will kiss boys. Just like how you and Daddy kiss eachother."

Good Lord.

Mom: "Yes honey, that's enough of this conversation."

Ava: "Don't worry mom... I am not going to kiss boys NOW. I won't do that for a long, long time, til I am a lot older. Right?"

I simply walked away, saying under my breath

"You bet your A** you won't be."

If You Can't Say Anything Nice...

Then shut your face. Alright, that is not quite how the old addage goes, it is a bit meaner and to the point, but some people need to hear it.

I am so sick of people and their opinions - to be more specific, people stating their opinions on a certain subject that they were never asked their opinion on in the first place.

What is it with people these days?

My topic of choice on this particular issue is children - how many you and your husband choose to have. This seems to be a popular subject that comes up at play dates with other mom's, and also at grocery stores with complete strangers.

Here are some things I have heard from people over the last year - ever since having our 4th baby, Olivia.

1.) "So I am assuming you are done having kids? 4 kids seems like way too much to handle, I could not imagine you having 5!"

2.) "Wow, you are not thinking of having another baby, if you are, you are crazy!!"

3.) "I think 4 kids is plenty, it is a nice round number."

What I would like to say in response, but don't as I would never stoop to their level of rudeness...
1.) How would you know how many kids would be too many for Brian and I? If you are asking this question you obviously don't have four kids, and don't know what it is like, so how would you know if it is a lot to handle, and why on earth would you care if we decided to have more children?

2.) Maybe we are, maybe we aren't. If we decide to, that is our decision, and I don't believe we would think it would be crazy for us to do so. And again, why would you care? Are we asking you to take care of them? No.

3.) (Yes, I have heard this one before, crazy right?) You think 4 kids is plenty for us? Why would you even think you have a say in how many kids Brian and I decide to have. And as to 4 being a nice round number?? It is ludicrous to think that Brian and I would look at eachother and say, oh we could not possibly have another baby, 4 is such a nice round number, 5 would just throw the nice "roundness" off.

I am not the only one who bears the brunt of these comments as I have spoken with other friends who have large families and they seem to get the same kind of response when people see how many children they have. I am not sure if they think the children are not all getting the attention they need and deserve, or if they think it is impossible to afford more than 2 or three kids, or what. But I can assure you, myself, and the other people I know that have chosen to have large families are responsible adults who are fully capable of taking care of our children -
we love them, feed them, clothe them, put roofs over their heads - you know, all the things parents are supposed to do for their kids.

My goodness, way back when our parents, and our parents parents were growing up large families were smiled upon, and thought to be such a wonderful thing. Which they are in my opinion - who would not want a house full of little kids, that grow up to be adults, and possibly get married and have oodles of kids themselves, which in turn gives you oodles of grandchildren to spoil? I will sign myself up for that anyday!

Now I know, a big family is NOT for everyone, but those people who are not particularly fond of the idea should keep their opinions to themselves unless asked. Pretty please?

All of this just drives me to want to go out and start procreating like a mad woman, have 5 more kids and say HAH! Look at me, I have a big, happy, healthy, well adjusted family and I love it.

But I won't.

Because 10 kids would be too much for Brian and I to handle. note to opinionated person who likes to tell me what they think is right for my family - I can say 10 would be too much as it is my life and my family. Not yours. Get it?

So I will say it again, in relation to the subject at hand, and any other subject that is frankly none of your business....

If you can't say anything nice, then shut your face.


***I know, I know... I am not practicing what I am preaching in this post by saying lots when I have nothing nice to say. But I had to get this all of my chest. Just this once. I will now go back to nodding politely at everyone's inappropriate comments whether it be about my family or any other of the millions of issues people feel the need to comment on that are simply none of their business. ****

My Tiny Dancer

Ava says that she does not like going to dance class. Every Monday we go through the same routine: At about 4pm it starts..

Mom: " Ava, you need to get upstairs and get your tight and leotard on."

Ava: "Awww... Why?"

Mom: "Because you have dance class tonight."

Ava: "But I don't want to go to dance class, I don't like it!"

Mom: "Too bad, go get dressed."

Ava: Long dramatic - very dramatic sigh. (as she stomps extra loudly up the stairs to her room to get changed.)

Forever my little drama queen....

All these dramatics are for nothing, as once we get there, get her ballet shoes on, and get her onto that dance floor she is in heaven. All smiles most of the time, but on occasion you will find her in a state of deep concentration,watching the teacher and trying her hardest to get the dance moves just right. Really, so very sweet to watch.

Anyway, we have some very exciting news - her class is in the process of getting ready for their dance recital in June which she is VERY excited about. Here she is practicing...

I am already on pins and needles waiting for her much anticipated dancing debut. It is going to be great. All 2 1/2 hours of it. :)

Chicken Tenders, The Food Of The Gods

Or at least in our house this is the case.

Our kids love chicken tenders (and the letter tater tots that I can spell their names with.) It seems to be all they eat lately, and I am wondering how it is possible that they are not getting tired of eating them. As I sit here typing, I am getting a wiff of the ever familiar smell of chicken tenders baking in the oven. Ugh.

I used to give the kids choices, and say: "Kids, would you like fish sticks, chicken tenders, or mac and cheese to eat?" Just a few examples of our daily menu choices - I know, not the healthiest, but Dad is gone a lot around here and I REFUSE to slave over the stove cooking some big meal for 4 kids who end up nibbling here and there and leaving the table. Way too much work... Anyway, back to my point. After giving them said choices they pretty much every time shout "chicken tenders." So, I recently decided to be a bit sneaky and NOT offer the chicken, and say "Kids... do you want pizza, mac and cheese, or spaghetti?"

The kids answer?

"Chicken tenders please!"

My thoughts on this? Don't make a big deal about the insane chicken tender consumption. I have found that if you don't want them to have something, it only makes them want it more. Let them eat chicken tenders until they are blue in the face, until they can't even stand to look at them anymore. No sweat off my back, right? :)

Paying Homage to Pink

As I am sure you have figured out from the above video, I am not talking about the color pink, but rather Pink the artist/singer. Some of you readers out there (you know who you are) may have needed this clarification. :)

Anyway, I am really loving Pink's music these days - the song 'So What' is especially fabulous. The video is even better, take a moment to watch.....

So, what did you think?

I love it. It is such a girl powerish/man haterish song, and the video really captures this. What girl (who is incredibly pissed off at her significant other) would not like to ride down the middle of a busy street on a lawn mower, drinking alchohol out of a coffee mug? Or take a chain saw in hand and cut down the very tree that you and your love carved your names into? Or even better, throw eggs at a car that is occupied by two love birds that were just married, and top it off by jumping on top of said car and bang your fists into it out of pure frustration of this new found love. Alright - these acts of rebellion and anger are a bit far fetched, and I certainly would never think to do any of them. Well, maybe I would. I think if Brian ever made me angry enough, and I had to choose to do just one of these things, it would be taking the lawn mower down the middle of a busy street drinking booze out of a coffee mug. That seems to be my style, the way I like to roll.

So as you can see, I like this song 'So What"', and all her other songs for that matter - even though it seems to be geared more to the 20 something crowd of music listeners. Let's just say I am not in this particular age bracket but I still love it, love it, love it. Maybe because it helps me get out my aggression when I am feeling frustrated or angry with Brian, I don't know. In any case, I will say again, I love it.

How much you ask?

So much so that when this song comes on the radio I turn it up REALLY loud, dance and sing along to it all while driving. I am definitely embarrasing the heck out of myself while doing so as I am sure fellow drivers have caught a glimpse of me "rocking out" and have found themselves laughing out loud. But I don't care.... If I am at home and it happens to come on the radio, I find myself dancing around the kitchen/family room. Both in the car and at home, my performances are found to be much to my children's delight... They seem to get such a kick out of me dancing and singing - which I am sure is because I am so very talentless in both of these categories.

Whatever the case may be, I just can't stop myself from dancing and singing along - the music is just too good to sit there and do nothing.

Way too good.

So to all of you strangers who may catch a glimpse of me as I dance/sing while driving and laugh at my expense, to my lovely husband (who calls me dorky), and to my kids who find me especially silly dancing my pants off at home.... I have to say.

"So What?"

Inquisitive Minds Want to Know

I was giving the kids their baths today when Lucas asked me a question. You know, one of those questions that catches you off guard and makes you turn away in laughter?

Here is how it all went down...

Lucas and Anthony were playing around in the bath with their Star Wars guys. Ava had long since been out of the bath - she is quite an efficient little bather. She gets in, washes hair, and body in its entirety, and gets out. Just how I like it - - unfortunately, the boys like to take their sweet time.

So, like I was saying Lucas and Anthony were playing Star Wars guys and probably would have kept on playing for hours if I had not interrupted them and told them to start washing up. They begrudgingly obliged, grabbed the Burt Bee's shampoo/body wash (LOVE this stuff) and started a washin'. I reminded them as usual in my lovely sing song voice with dance included "Don't forget your pitty wits (arm pits), chest, leggies, booties, and privates." Very silly - I would certainly never sing this song or dance this dance for anyone other than my kids... but it gets them laughing, and more importantly, gets them to wash all that needs to be washed. Anywhoo, I was in the middle of singing this song o' mine when I looked over and saw Lucas scrubbing up with a very quizzical look on his face. I stopped singing, and started doing some asking:

Mom: "What's wrong Lucas?"

Lucas: "Hey Mom, do I have brains in my penis?"

This is where I did my ever so sly turn of the head and started quietly giggling to myself. What the heck kind of question was that?? I gained my compsure and turned back to him.

Mom: "No honey, you don't."

Lucas: "Oh." He sat down in the tub to wash all the soap off. A few minutes passed. "Hey mom?"

Mom: "Yes, Lucas, what is it?"

Lucas: "I know what is in there. It must be balls. Yep, that is what it is, I just forgot. There are balls in there."

This time, I had to leave the room for a moment I was laughing so hard.

Lucas: "Hey Mom, what is wrong?"

Mom: "Nothing honey, time to get out of the tub."

Kids. Where do they come up with this stuff???

Some Things I Miss

that I took for granted prior to having my kids, prior to having someone attached to me at what seems like all times....



I miss being able to clean my house AND have it stay cleaned for more than 1 hour. I tend to clean with at least one child following behind me messing whatever it was I spent the last half hour cleaning up.

I miss being able to take a shower for as long as I want without any kids in the bathroom or in the shower with me..... Ususally the kids are running around like wild people from one end of the bathroom to the other, or wrestling eachother which ALWAYS leads to someone crying and throwing a tantrum. Sometimes I am lucky enough to get Ava and Lucas settled on the couch in front of the T.V. in hopes of whisking myself away upstairs and getting a nice quiet, relaxing shower. HAH, right, Anthony can literally smell me leaving a room and is always two feet behind me. He tends to hang out on the floor right in front of the shower door waiting for me to finish. I guess this is better than just a few months back, where he insisted on getting into the shower with me and sitting right at my feet.

I miss being able to go to the bathroom all by myself. Especially when I am having - ahem- stomach issues. Yesterday I was feeling a bit "under the weather" if you know what I mean. Which meant I was taking a lot of trips to the bathroom that were rather unpleasant in nature. These types of things are best done in private, or at least you hope they can be done in private. Not for me - Anthony, Ava and Lucas all had to peek their heads in to ask me what I was doing (what do they think I was doing??) Other times (like I said, I was in the bathroom a lot yesterday) they had to go so far as to come into the bathroom with me, close the door behind them and hang out until I was finished. Privacy in this area is nonexsistent in our house, and it frankly stinks - no pun intended. I am funny, aren't I?

I miss being able to sleep through the night without being woken up to a child yelling such things as :

" I want some juicy!!" (Lucas)

"I can't sleep anymore, I want to go downstairs!" (Ava)

"I want to watch a toony (cartoon)!" or his latest obsession "I want to play Sta Waws (Star Wars)!" (Anthony)

"WAAAAA - WAAAAAAA" translates into "I am hungry Mom!! (Olivia)


Adding to this point, I SO miss being able to sleep in. I am not talking until 10am here, just until 7:30am would be nice - actually it would be Heaven sent.

I guess I am able to find some joy in the fact that 15 years from now I will be able to do all these things with ease, and in peace again. Although I am wondering if when I finally get to this point in time, I will be wishing for a bit of that chaos back. Funny that I would even think this... but the chaos that admittedly drives me to my breaking point on most days, seems to keep things interesting around here.

Valentine's Day.... Who Needs it?

So tomorrow is Valentine's Day, most people love this "holiday". But not Brian. Brian thinks it is a made up holiday and hates it. To be a bit more specific, he loathes it. He thinks it is a day that gives all the men in this world a reason to rush out and buy the standard roses, chocolates and teddy bears that if purchased any other day of the week, would be half the price. And the whole romantic dinner at a restaurant thing - don't even ask what he thinks about that.

The funny thing is, I actually sort of agree with him. Maybe that is because I think getting a box of chocolates or a stuffed animal from your siginificant other is sort of -- cheesy. Come on guys, I think you can do a bit better than the standard heart shaped chocolate box and Teddy Bear - oh , and let's not forget about the tried and true roses..... Roses. Blah. I don't really care for flowers (roses especially) as they are expensive and they just die. (They usually die a bit sooner in my care as I tend to forget to water them.) Occasionally it is nice to receive some pretty wildflowers or something, but roses? Please.

The whole holiday all seems a bit cliche to me - Brian would be so proud to hear me say this. Really, he would.

Anyway, he does not need this holiday we call Valentines Day that creeps up once every year, to be some big romantic blow out of a day. And I don't either. I much prefer his way of showing his undying love for me (which he does quite a bit, for no particular reason) whenever he feels the need. And let me say, I think the things he does are quite fabulous.

He occasionally has wild flowers (as I said earlier, Roses, blah) sent to the house for me, out of the blue, not for an anniversary, birthday or any other reason, just because. Romantic.

Whenever I go away for a weekend without him and the kids (which is rare, very rare) he writes me a little love note and sticks it in my suitcase for me to find when I get to my destination. Romantic.

He occasionally will send me a text message saying "I love you 'pooh' ( I know the nickname is silly, but it has special meaning for us) you are the best." Romantic.

Today he left for St. Louis to work a boat show. I had to run upstairs to grab the laundry from our bedroom and I noticed a piece of his notebook paper sitting on the bed. I grabbed it ready to toss it in the garbage, when I noticed it was a note. A love note, for me. (insert warm fuzzy feeling).

Romantic.

All of these things he does are simple. And unexpected. Which makes them that much more romantic to me.

And I love him for it. He is the best.

Save the Drama For Your...

We all know how the old addage goes, so need I finish it??

Oh how I wish that Ava would not save the drama for me, aka "mama". Why can't she save it up and unleash it all on her Dad every once and awhile? It all wears me down, every day there seems to be something she can find to have a break down about. Every darn day. Here are some examples from this week.

I asked her to share a piece of the gum I bought at Target with her brother - she broke down in tears saying "It is just not fair, it is my gum!" She cried for a half hour.

Anthony started to play her playstation handheld that she had absolutely no interest in until she saw him playing it. She said she wanted it back "RIGHT NOW" because she was just about to play it (yah, right.) I tell her no, and a 30 minute melt down insued.

I told her she could not sit in the front seat with me as it is not safe. She needed to be in the back seat in her booster. She cried the whole way to Grandma and Papa's saying "It's not fair, I am big enough to sit in the front seat!" (30 minute ride)

We were working on the alphabet and she was writing out all of the letters in her notebook, when she got to "y" she was stumped. I showed her how to write it, then had her try. She wrote it backwards, noticed it was wrong, ripped the page out of the notebook, crumpled it up in a ball and threw it on the floor. This time no crying, just a very dramatic sour puss look on her face. She kept that look on her face for about 20 minutes before trying the alphabet again.

She came home from school the other day asking when I was going to set up the play date with Lauren. I told her I was working on it. Her response, " You have been saying that forever! I am never going to get to play with Lauren!"

All of these "episodes" have led to her having to apologize, and some have lead to a time out in her room (what she dreads the most). So as you can see, I am trying to "nip this in the bud" now, before she is acting like this as a teenager. (Oh the teenage years, I am scared, very scared.)

I have spoken to my girlfriends who have girls and they all assure me that they are in the same boat. That all girls are just this dramatic. I wanted to hear from more women, outside of my few close girlfriends, so I asked some more. How, do you ask, did I do this?

Well good old Facebook, of course! I wrote as my status update: "Are all 6 year old girls this dramatic about pretty much everything?"

Here are some of the responses I received.

"Yes and it only gets worse. It's a long, continuous phase, with no light at the end of the tunnel. Trust me."


"There are glimmers of light along the way and just when you start to believe the phase is over...another wave of tsunami comes rolling in... I can gurantee you, it continues into their teens, only the subject matter changes..."

"Yes, they are....and if I think that it's going to get better, my mom just reminds me what I was like....if that's the case then I'm screwed! :)"

Unfortunately, it does not look like things are going to get any better anytime soon. I will have to resort to the fact that I will be dealing with this for many, many years to come and learn to just deal with it.

At least I can take comfort in the fact that pretty much every other mom out there can relate. Because really, there is nothing better than other mom's sharing in your plight. It just makes you feel a bit better that you are not alone in this battle we call parenting, right?

My Anthony Thomas

For those of you that know him it comes as no surprise that he can be a handful (to put it lightly), at times. But he can also have moments where he is oh so sweet.


Today he had a moment....

We were driving home from dropping Lucas off at preschool. He was sitting quietly in his car seat playing with his Star Wars guys when he suddenly had something to say:

Anthony: "Mommy, I love you too much."

Mom: "I love you too honey."

Anthony: "No Mommy, I really love you too much."

Moments like this are the best ever. Hands down.

I am Having a Problem...

just saying "no" to more babies. I love my kids, I have four rambunctious, kids ALL under the age of 6 that keep me on my toes. My hands are full running to school, dance classes, play dates, and the like. I am busy, busy, busy, so why can't I stop thinking about having more, just one more??

Maybe it's because my youngest, Olivia is already 7 months old and I am feeling like the "baby stage" is behind me for good. And it makes me sad.... I loved the baby stage with all four of my kids, the itty bitty fingers and toes, the sweet smell of their baby breath, the way their fuzzy head felt when you would lightly run your lips across it. I loved it, loved it, loved it.

The days when they cried too much, kept me up all night, pooped, peed and ate seemingly around the clock were all forgotten just by looking at their little baby faces. This was even the case with my Ava Marie who cried for the first three months of her life. No jokes here. She cried, and cried, and cried....

They were all so darn sweet when they were babies. Take a gander....

Ava
Lucas

Anthony

Olivia

But I can't want another baby just because I am going to miss the "baby stage," right? Because as we all know, they do grow up....Which I am finding is a good thing. They help out with Olivia bunches, we go shopping together, have fun conversations, all kinds of stuff that babies can't do. I see them each morphing into their own little personalities -they are becoming good little kids, which in turn (I am hoping) will result in them becoming strong, well rounded, respectful adults.

Beyond all of this, I find such joy in the fact that I had a hand in all this. I conceived them all (well, Brian may have helped with that part), carried them in my belly for nine months, gave birth to them (which, may I say, was excruciating pain all four times), and have done a pretty darn good job raising them up to this point.

So far, so good.

So really....why not one more?

I think I am just going to call myself straight up NUTS for even thinking about it - I am content with my 4 babes, that is all I need. I feel "fulfilled".

Really.

I can just hear the sigh of relief coming from my mother-in-law after hearing this. I had you worried, didn't I ? :)

Many apologies for my self-indulgent ramblings, but I am able to do this here and there. Plus, it's a blog, isn't that was these things are for??

We like carbs...

A lot. Especially Anthony. So much to the point that I can't seem to get the child to eat anything but bread, bagels, plain old slices of bread, pizza with all the toppings and sauce taken off, not the most appetizing things, but some of his favorites none the less. He really loves this stuff --- Actually, if you take a close look at the picture above, you will notice that he is kissing his bagel, yes folks, you heard me right, he is kissing it. I was sitting on the couch with him while he was eating it and noticed he was giving it a kiss in between bites. Goodness, have you ever seen an almost 3 year old love a bagel, or any type of food that much? More about the bagel in a minute...

Today he would not eat the breakfast I made him, and I guess I don't blame him as it was nothing special. Just some cheerios in a bowl sans the milk - very boring, but I have not been to the grocery store in a week and supplies are beginning to dwindle. He decided at lunch time not to eat what I put in front of him either - chicken tenders and carrots. I figured I needed to get him to eat something today, so about mid-afternoon I asked him if he would like a bagel. His eyes lit up as if I were asking him if he wanted a bowl of ice cream with a cherry on top.

Glad to see that a plain old whole wheat bagel can enduce such enthusiasm from my three year old.

He happily took the bagel from my hand and said "thanks for the doughnut!"

Interesting.

It seems that for some reason he thinks a bagel is actually a doughnut, which explains his excitement. I guess it sort of looks like a doughnut, but it sure as heck does not taste like a doughnut. But who am I to question it - he is eating a healthy, whole wheat bagel.

And loving it. Enough said.

It's All Worth It

I was woken up at the ungodly hour of 5am this morning by my lovely daughter Ava who does not understand the meaning of sleeping in. This is not good in our household as both Brian and I are so not morning people. I have learned over the past year or so that the best plan of attack for the mornings are to get her downstairs on the couch with a bowl of honey nut cheerios (sans the milk) and cartoons on. These few things tend to get her to lay nicely on the couch until I come down for the morning, which if I am lucky,and the rest of the kids sleep, is about 6:30am.

This morning I was not so lucky. I got Ava down on her couch per usual, and as soon as I got back into my warm and cozy bed, just about ready to doze back off into dreamland, Anthony got up. I turned to look at the alarm clock and saw that it was 5:30am. Ugh. I got out of bed once again, got Anthony downstairs, and attempted to sneak back up to bed. I unfortunately did not make it. Anthony came running yelling, "no Mommy, sweep (sleep) on the couch... Please Mommy!" I begrudginly made my way to the couch and curled myself in a ball with a blanket, knowing it was pretty unlikely I was going to get back to sleep. But a girl can hope, right? A few minutes into my attempt at slumber...

Anthony: "Mommy, I want to play Staw Waws (Star Wars), pwease (please) turn it on for me?"

I got up and turned it on for him, curled back up on the couch, and tried once again to sleep. About 10 minutes passed

Anthony: " Mommy, I'm Thiwsty (thirsty), can I have some juice?"

I got up again, got him some juice, curled back up on the couch, and tried again to sleep. I was not going to give that easy. I wanted to sleep. Really bad. Another 10 minutes passed, I was hopeful.

Anthony: "Mommy, I'm hungry, I want some chewioos (cheerios)." Grrrrrrr!!! This time I got up in a state of anger, got him his cheerios, was about to give the whole sleep thing one last go, when livi started crying. She was up, and the attempt at getting back to sleep was O -V- E- R.

All this unfolded while my lovely Brian was fast asleep, this is usual, so I don't know why I get so frustrated every Saturday and Sunday morning when it happens. But what I can't understand is how he can possibly sleep through all of the commotion? Maybe he is faking sleep so he does not have to get up and deal with it all. Hmmmm... I will have to look into that one.

Anyway, I gave Mr. Shelton until 8am and then I made my way upstairs with the 4 kids to make the hand off. He was already up and ready to come downstairs. He told me to go ahead and take a nap - this was good as it was my plan all along. He and the kids left the room, while I got into my fabulous sleep number bed, pulled the 1,000 thread count sheets over me along with my down comforter, and went off to dreamland. At least for a while. I awoke to the sound of Livi crying in her crib - it was the inevitable "I am hungry cry feed me now cry". I snuck into her room, scooped her up in my arms and took her to bed with me. I nursed her and we fell back asleep together for about an hour.

I would have to say these are some of the sweetest things.

Naps.

Even better Naps with Livi Grace.



Really, is there anything sweeter?

What the Heck Happened to My Body?

(My pre-pregnancy body.... Wish I could get it back, exactly like this. Darn.)

KIDS happened to my body, that's what happened.

I was looking at my lovely self in the mirror today (in my birthday suit) prior to getting in the shower and found myself wanting to weep. I am just not liking what I see lately, to be more specific, I am not liking what I am seeing after carrying, and pushing out 4 children.

With clothes off....

(I will start at the bottom and work my way up) My upper thighs are flabby and jiggle around while I go about my business around the house, my butt is saggy and flabby, my stomach is stretchy and flabby, and lastly, my used to be favorite part of my body, my girls (aka boobs) are covered in stretch marks, and just plain old don't look like they did pre-kids.

This part makes me saddest of all as they used to be my favorite part or shall I say parts. I never had "big ones", but I did not consider them small either, just a nice handful (how my lovely Brian used to describe them.) I do have to say that they have not met their demise quite yet, in fact, right now they are actually looking pretty nice.

And big.

And perky.

Unfortunately this is short lived as the reason for them looking so nice big and perky is that I am still nursing Olivia. I am thinking this is one of the reasons I don't quite want to give up nursing her yet as I know what will happen when I do....

Ready for it??

They slowly drain of all the milk, which in turn causes them to get saggy and limp, which in turn makes the stretch marks on them even more noticeable. Ugh, I hate to even think of it. I am only 32, and my body already looks like an 80 year olds. NOT OK. I know, I am dramatic, but it makes for good entertainment, right?

With clothes on....

Not much to say. Actually, I have nothing to complain about. I think I look great, as all of the aforementioned (I like this word) flaws are hidden away.

I know, complain, complain, complain, but I find it a bit cathartic to complain on occasion.

I should probably mention that all this complaining does not go unnoticed by my lovely Brian. He once tried to tell me that maybe, just maybe these body changes were not due to having children, but were due to simply getting older. Ah, let's just say that did not go over well. At all. He quickly changed his tune and on the occasions I get frustrated and worked up about my body when "disrobed" (is that a word?)he simply tells me that I am still as hot as the day I met him. I think this may be a bit of a stretch, but I love him for saying it anyway. He always makes me feel better about myself, he is good AND smart like that.....

On the other hand, my OB doctor tells me like it is. She has no reason to sugar coat anything as she does not have to live with me. I love my OB doctor. Love her, love her, love her. But I hate how she is so honest about things. I happened to mention at my postpardum check up after I had Ava (6 years ago) that I was feeling great but could not wait until I got my body back to the way it was pre-pregnancy. She looked at me, laughed, and said, "Maria, your body will never be the same as it was before you had kids." I walked out of there thinking she was crazy. I could do it.

I quickly found that some things just cannot be fixed. No amount of working out was going to get my hips to be the way they were (they shifted outward a bit while Ava was cooking in my belly for 9 whole months) or get my stretched out belly skin to lay flat and look nice and smooth again (4 kids does a number on the stretch factor of your stomach area).

All I can say is pooh, pooh, pooh.

So like I said, KIDS happened to my body, and I need to just embrace that and deal with it, cause it ain't gonna change. Insert sigh. Big, long, dramatic sigh.

Note to readers (as I know I have so very many):I do love each and every one of my kids tremendously and they were worth every single stretch mark and every bit of flab. So don't go thinkin' I am a shallow person who only cares about my looks. I care about a lot of things, and my looks are one of them but what woman doesn't?

Onto My "Soapbox" I Go

Alright, this post has been a brewin' for quite some time now - today is the day I need to get it all off of my chest. So here goes...

Let's just say Mom's these days in my age range (30 somethings) are a bit over the top when it comes to parenting. It seems as if they are on a never ending quest be the perfect mother or what they perceive to be the perfect mother. The funny thing is that I don't believe there is such a thing, and this is in my eyes, is good. We all make mistakes as parents, yell, lose our tempers, ignore kids fighting when we don't want to deal, let them go to bed without brushing their teeth on occasion (these are just a few of my own personal misgivings). But I am a firm believer that these mistakes help our kids to grow into well rounded adults.

This being said, I get so frustrated, irritated, bugged, annoyed, at what some Mom's think constitutes being a "perfect mom" even though, like I said, I don't believe there is such a thing.... There are 3 main topics which I find come up quite frequently when large groups of women are put together discussing their kids.

1. Movies: I overheard a conversation one day at a play date about the kid movies that were out on video, which ones were good, bad, etc. It went something like this... (different name inserted for "ahem" privacy purposes.)"My Billy NEVER watches PG movies. I, in fact, went to the video store and picked up a movie for him to watch, found out it was PG when I got home, turned right back around and returned it. My Billy ONLY can watch G movies." The other Mom's in the circle were all ever so dramatically nodding their approval, which was making the irritation inside me boil over. I could not resist welcoming myself into the conversation (I am good like that) and asked, "Really? Didn't you watch a bit of it first to see if it was inappropriate before returning it? Sometimes PG movies can be harmless." ( I wanted to add"sometimes even PG-13 as well,"but thought better of it.) To which she replied, "Absolutely not." I knew right then there was no point in attempting to continue the conversation as she was pretty much set on the fact that any movie rated other than G was not appropriate for a 5 year old.

2.) T.V. watching: This is another one that really gets me. So many Mom's only let their kids watch 1/2 hour of T.V. a day, some even say they go days without turning on their T.V. at all. Same thing with Video game playing, Mom's are always talking about how horrible it is to let kids have these hand held video games that are all the rage right now. They claim that all the kids who play these games simply sit around on the couch all day long staring at the video screen, eating potato chips and getting fat. How the heck would they know?? The funny thing about this is that whenever I hear Mom's talking about the fact that they have never subjected their kids to video games or excessive T.V. watching,they seem so proud of themselves. Like they are saving their child from being scarred for life. Please.

3.) Kids being kids.You know, pretending to be Anakin and Darth Vader fighting with their light sabers, running around with their Nerf guns shooting eachother and dodging behind furniture, jumping on the couches, playing leap frog with the throw pillows, etc. These are all examples of things that I let my kids do in our house on a daily basis. I have in fact mentioned these things in passing while at events with other moms and have gotten such responses as " My 'Billy' will NEVER play with or own a light saber, nerf gun or anything. That just teaches him that being violent is O.K." I also have heard, "You let your kids jump on your couches? That is simply not allowed in our home." And jumping on throw pillows, well that is just plain unheard of.

How sad is it that we don't let our kids just be kids. Sort of like how our parents let us be when we were young. We watched all kinds of movies, heck I still remember watching all the Star Wars movies when I was in grade school. I remember watching Tom and Jerry run after eachother whacking eachother over the head with pans, bats, and chopping off eachothers heads
with knives. I remember watching Elmer Fudd run after Bugs Bunny shooting him with his rifle. We watched all of this kind of stuff and we turned out alright, so what the heck is the big deal these days with Sponge Bob?

As far as video games go, my God, myself, my siblings and friends had our faces glued to the T.V. for months when Nintendo first came out as we were OBSESSED with trying to "save the princess". We had play dates where friends would come over to play Atari, or Nintendo.

We would jump all over our couches, and build forts on them. We would have pillow fights and play leap frog with Mom's throw pillows and had a gay old time doing so. No one was hurt (or at least nothing that lead to an emergency room trip), and we created some really great childhood memories.

So I know I am not the only "thirty-something" mom who grew up like this as all my friends were right there with me, watching PG, AND PG-13 movies, watching cartoons, and playing video games until our eyes would start to burn. We lived for running around wild playing swords, guns, and jumping all over Mom and Dad's furniture - that was what being a kid was all about.

So what the heck has happened??

I think so many Mom's out there believe that being the perfect Mom entails them not letting their kids do the aforementioned things, and this to me is just ridiculous!

As I said earlier, I firmly believe that there is so such thing as a perfect Mom, so let's just forget about trying to be one, lay back,let our kids be kids and enjoy the ride.

Anthony's Singing Debut

Anthony loves the song Twinkle Twinkle Little Star. If he had it his way this would be the only song that he would prefer to hear, and sing. Ever. I tend to sing as I am going about my business during the day, not sure why, I guess it sort of brightens up my day a bit, and makes the task at hand, whether it be cleaning toilets, doing dishes, folding laundry, etc. a bit more cheery. Anyway, I usually shuffle between The Wheels on the Bus, All Around the Mulberry Bush, Twinkle Star, and Livi Grace is Special (written by yours truly.) Anthony loves listening to me sing my song to Livi Grace which goes like this.... (It takes after a certain Barney song most of us moms know).

Livi Grace is special she's the only one, she's the only one like her, there isn't another in the whole wide world that can do what Livi does. Livi Grace is special, special, Livi Grace is special, Livi Grace in her, her, her own way!

I would have posted a video of little old me singing this, as I am sure that you are dying to know how it sounds being sung, but I thought I would spare you as my singing ablity is not one of my strong suits.

Anyway, like I said, Anthony loves hearing me sing this song to Livi, and he even enjoys singing along with me. BUT, if I try and switch it up a bit and insert his name in the song instead of Livi's, he throws a fit and says something like this every time. "NO Mommy! Dat is not my song, dat is Livi Grace's song. Sing me Twinkle Staw!" For some reason he has gotten it in his head that Twinkle Star is his song, which is fine, whatever makes him happy, right?

Well, we sing this song quite a bit as we go through our day, and over the past few months he has learned to memorize it. Of course he does not have the words quite right, but what 2 year old would? I figured I would video tape him singing his all time favorite song for all to enjoy....

NOTE TO READERS: I know, I know, the video is sideways. It took me oodles and oodles of time to try and figure out how to get the darn video off of my phone, onto my computer and playing. Trying is the operative word here folks, I was actually not successful in figuring it out, Brian was. I ended up having to forward the file to his computer, where he had to convert the file to something that was able to be played on my computer so that I could in turn post it here. Whew.... So I finally got it from him this morning only to open it and find that it plays in this wonderful sideways position, and I can't figure out how the heck to get it right side up. I just don't care, I am over trying to get it right, so just tilt your head to the side a bit and enjoy.....

I do have to say, from the shy beginning, to the quite violent swaying from side to side (while eating Skittles), it was a successful performance.

And to top it off, he gave a wave and blew a kiss to end it all - he's a natural.

We Have Gone To The Dark Side

For those of you not well versed in the saying's from this ever popular movie series, the Dark Side I am speaking of would be Star Wars.


The kids, mostly Lucas and Anthony LOVE Star Wars, the movies, video games, toys, ANYTHING Star Wars is God like in their eyes. Really, they are quite obsessed. Anthony loves playing dress up lately. Here he is as Darth Vader. He tends to put on the mask, and walk around stiff legged growling "I am Darth Vada - I am Darth Vada!! I AM DARTH VADA!!" He progresively gets louder and louder, assuming that this will scare myself and his siblings more.

Other days he takes on the more timid role of Yoda. He enjoys putting on this hat and skipping around the house happily saying "Oda, Oda, Oda!"

Lucas most enjoys telling me all about the different characters, what their names are, what they do, etc. We actually just had a very enlightening conversation about all this Star Wars stuff the other day.

Lucas: "Mom, I like CPPO (C-3PO), R2B2 (R2D2), and Chewbacca - sometimes they call him Chewy, the best."

Mom: "Is Chewbacca the one that is covered in all that hair?"

Lucas: "Actually Mom, that is not hair, that is fur. He is just really furry."

When Lucas is home from preschool he and Anthony love to play with their Mighty Mugg Star Wars guys, of which we have too many of. This is the result of good old Mom being overindulgent at Target pretty much every time we go. I admit, I have a weakness for giving in to the kids when they want things...

They enjoy playing fight scenes with these assorted Star Wars characters.

They also love playing Star Wars video games, and watching Star Wars Clone Wars shows on the Cartoon channel at night. They beg for a new Star Wars toy everyday, Star Wars, Star Wars, Star Wars - I never hear the end of it. Really, I believe it is turning into an obession of grand proportions.

At least I can take some comfort in the fact that the oodles of Star Wars games, movies, toys, books, etc. were a good investment as they have been playing with them non-stop for a year now.

And they are still going strong.

I guess I don't see us coming back from the dark side anytime soon.